You’re better off with an iPad as babysitter
Release Date: October 13, 2017
Director: McG
Starring: Judah Lewis, Samara Weaving, Bella Thorne, Robbie Amell, Andrew Bachelor, Hana Mae Lee, Emily Alyn Lind
Favorite Quote:
Normally, when I do these Don’t Watch This reviews, I usually have a quote that I liked from the movie that was memorable. Yeah, not with this movie. I left the Favorite Quote entry empty on purpose because of that.
The Babysitter is a coming-of-age movie mixed with some horror/comedy. I remember showing the trailers to Punisher and Uncle Willy after I first saw it. The first thing they asked was, “what the hell was this crap?” Well, I got the chance to watch it on Netflix. It’s a Netflix Original movie directed by McG. Yes, the same McG who produced the following movies: Stay Alive, We Are Marshall, Stolen, Before We Go, and The Duff. Not a stellar filmography.
Twelve-year-old Cole (Judah Lewis) is constantly picked on. He’s scared of almost everything and still needs to have a babysitter while all of his friends have outgrown them. Hell, at the age of 9, I was left alone at night with no babysitter. Okay, that’s what happens when you have Hispanic parents. Not a good example.
His babysitter, Bee (Samara Weaving), usually stands up for Cole and likes to hang out with him when she babysits him. One night, when Bee is babysitting Cole, he decides to stay up to see what Bee does when he falls asleep. This is where shit goes down as Bee invites her friends over and they sacrifice someone to the devil.
(Note: Before you go on saying, “man you just spoiled the movie,” my response is this: no I didn’t. The trailer spoiled it already!)
The acting in the movie was not that bad, but the dialog was horrible. Everyone filled their role in an over-the-top manner, and they are pretty stereotypical roles. The movie has the dumb cheerleader, the jock, the sexy psychotic babysitter, the other crazy chick and the boy who is forced to grow up.
The movie is a bit self-aware. There are moments in the movie that realizes it’s cheesy and rolled with it. I actually chuckled from some of the cheesiness. Bee and Cole play well off each other. They have the best chemistry in the entire movie, and I actually enjoyed that. You can actually tell that everyone in the movie had fun with their roles. Again, everyone played well, including my man King Bach as the comic relief.
The Babysitter is predictable, as you can figure out what will happen within the movie before it happens. The blood spurts are over the top, and so is the dialogue. The movie tries to mix in Home Alone with a teen slasher feel but fails at it. I was bored throughout the movie and only chuckled on how stupid everyone was. If you want a cheesy horror/comedy, light on horror and comedy but heavy on the extra cheese, then this is the movie for you. If you want to shut off your brain and not think at all, this is the movie for you. For those who are horror enthusiasts and enjoy a good horror movie, stay away! It’s as scary as a Pixar movie. It’s decent for those who just want to have something playing in the background while working around the house.
I don’t recommend that anyone watch this. But it could be worse. It’s not as bad as Thankskilling, that’s for sure.
